You may have noticed when shopping at your local corporate megastore, Dear Breeder, that pocket handkerchiefs come in many assorted colors. Obviously, blue and red are used to indicate streetgang affiliations; but what are such nondescript colors as purple, yellow, and periwinkle good for? Once again, your well-meaning, albeit naive, curiosity has opened up a disgusting can of filthy, gay worms. For years, big city gays and lesbians have used multicolored handkerchiefs to indicate various sexual preferences and practices. Come slither in the dirt with us, Dear Breeder, as we explain the myriad, intricate meanings of our emblematic accessories with this easy-to-use reference guide.
Next time you blow your nose, Dear Breeder, we urge you to pay attention to what color hanky you use, and into which pocket you stuff it. As always, we’ve got our beady little eyes trained directly at your rear end, and are awaiting the slightest sign, suggestion, or color-coded invitation to strike! What color are we currently flagging? Why, sandalwood beige, as always…
You do the math.
Breeder's Digest 